The Household Lizard- Much Ado About Nothing

George Orwell in this famous novel “Animal Farm” writes “Four legs good, two legs bad!!” I don’t agree (well I know this is being taken a bit of context). Out of the four legged creatures roaming on the planet the species which I despise the most is the cockroach and the species which I fear the most is the Household Lizard. This does not mean I am not scared of the great hunters like the tiger, lion cheetah etc. but the thing is that I have never encountered them outside a zoo and therefore I am not really in a position to comment.

Day before yesterday around 5:45AM when I was sleeping a bit too soundly in my bed (bed meaning only the mattress, I don’t own a bed and so sleep on the mattress spread on the floor) I got a tingly feeling near my right ear. After a few moments I jerked my head to get rid of the nuisance and behold!! Right next to my head and near my iPod laid a small household lizard. I am sure it was a lizard and nothing else as in the early morning light I could make out the shape of the vermin :(

I woke up with a start and immediately switched on the lights of the room, but predictably the lizard was nowhere to be seen. It had concealed itself under the loads of “pasara” (marathi word meaning “a mess”) I had so effortlessly assembled around my bed :) . I went to bed after half an hour thinking if the lizard is intelligent enough to trace the same path again and again. I knew that at least elephants have a sharp memory to remember the path they took earlier and also to avoid a particular path incase of any dangers they had sensed there earlier.

I think the lizard is not intelligent enough, as yesterday night I never got a tingly feeling or maybe it is even more intelligent, it is playing the waiting wanting me to believe that it will never and then it will make a comeback and maybe bite off my ear or something.

Bite off my ear!!!! Are household lizards harmful or do they believe in peaceful co-existence with human feeding on flies, and other small insects? I don’t know but then to tell you the truth I never thought of it. Maybe the adjective ‘household’ is meant to convey something. But then I cannot be sure until I get some dope on this. I goggled and this is what I got:

Household lizards are not at all dangerous on the other hand they are pretty useful in controlling the spread of small insects like flies and cockroaches. Now my flat has cockroaches, this might be a good sign :) :) :). Nonetheless below are the techniques to get rid of lizards!!!!

Using Peacock Feathers: (By far the most imaginative technique I have come across ) The funda is peacocks feed on lizards and also it is not feasible to have a peacock as your pet so use peacock feathers. The lizards will be scared. So stick peacock feathers on the ceiling and on the walls or places where lizards frequent in your house and wait did I mention that peacock feathers being colorful will add an aura to your place :)

Scaring Pests with Pets : (I don’t have Pets .No elaboration here)

Lizards follow Lights: (And I thought Lizards were nocturnal :) :) ) Lizards are usually seen in well-lit places. Turn off the lights in your room when you’re not around so they won’t hang out in there. Turn off the lights when you go to bed. This way, you do not just save power; you also give the lizards a curfew. Always keep places dark where you usually see them, as often as you can. Lizards often run away to escape. To find them, turn off the lights inside the room, get a flashlight and light up a corner of the room. You can easily find them because their big eyes reflect the light, twinkling like stars. If they do not make a move when you direct a light on them, then that is the best time to terminate them.

Keeping your place clean: (Hell, I ain’t ever gonna do that. No elaboration here)

Use of Pesticides: (NO..I am a nature guy ..psst..I don’t take ayurvedic medicines though once in a while I use MEDIMIX :) :))

5 ways to get rid of lizards!!! Can you believe it…
As Shakespeare rightly said “Much Ado About Nothing!!!!”

The Modern Nomad!!!

A youth of about 21 years lands in the city with his luggage not knowing what lies ahead of him. The rickshaw-wallahs crowd around him screaming to take him places in the city. One intelligent rickshaw driver knows where this confused youth dressed in casual clothes belongs and shouts out the name of a respectable IT firm in the city. The youth laps it up and loads himself along with his baggage into that rickshaw. Throughout the ride he is peering out trying to take in as much of the scene as possible. The rickshaw finally halts and he gets down. He has never being to this place before. However the name of the locality matches the address he has printed on a sheet of paper in his jeans pocket. His father’s acquaintance who he has never met before opens the door of the flat and asks him to be comfortable.

A week from that day; the youth takes leave of the acquaintance and loads another rickshaw to take him to another locality. He does not seem jittery now. A week in the city has helped his confidence however he still has to work on learning the local tongue. He pays the rickshaw driver the amount which the acquaintance had agreed upon before with the driver. A thought that maybe the previous rickshaw driver duped him earlier crosses his mind for a moment. He smiles (out of helplessness) and moves on. A few hours later he is done arranging his wares in his new flat. “My place”, he says to himself. Only to realize few moments later that he is a tenant on lease.

He is happy to know that a swimming pool and a gym have been opened in his building. The next day he makes his way to the building gym only to return dejected when the security at the entrance informs him that these amenities were only for flat owners and not for the tenants. He does not understand the logic but feels too awkward to raise his voice. “Why was the security guy talking to me with disdain?” he thinks. He again smiles (out of helplessness) and moves on.

Six months pass by. He is not sure if the other beings in his building are aware of his existence or not. Being a tenant he is extra careful not to create a nuisance for anybody, more so the security. He drinks no doubt but only at his friend’s flat (who owns the flat) returning the next morning worried what impression would it create on the others (owners) had he returned home feeling high. A month later he wakes up to find a society notice pushed under his flat door which says that he is to vacate his flat in a month’s time. There was no word from the owner of the flat about this. The notice says “In the Annual General Body Meeting convened on 4th April 2009, it was decided that the society will no longer allow the flat owners to rent out their flats to bachelors. Only families will be allowed.” "What Annual General Body Meeting?" he thinks to himself. He remembers reading a notice about the time and venue of the meeting but then tenants were not allowed there too. Were the victims not even allowed to present their case? He calls up the owner who is equally surprised. His owner lives in a different city and he too has no idea. The owner confirms the news and glumly asks him to vacate the flat in a month’s time. He tries to smile but in vain!!!

A few weeks later the youth again loads himself along with his belongings in a rickshaw which takes him to another address. He is not sure how long he will be able to call that address his own. “I am more of a Modern Nomad than a software professional” he thinks to himself feeling proud about the originality of the thought.

Mee Shivaji Raje Bhosale Boltoy

* (click on the movie poster to see the Teaser!!!)

Bapu did it in Munnabhai-II and now Shivaji Raje will do it exclusively for the Marathi Manoos :) Dinkar Maruti Bhosale (played by Sachin Khedkar) is your typical Marathi manoos (typical meaning as a marathi manoos is always potrayed by the media or the others around him) who is used, abused and more used, more abused..even more used, even more abused.....

This is how the Marathi Manoos is introduced in the flick (I gathered this from the promo):

Eke kali dinosaur sarkha disnara..pan aata chilta evdha zhalela..

hach toh Marathi Manoos

Dinkar Maruti Bhosale!!!!

Shivaji raje Bhonsale comes to the rescue of this Marathi Manoos and what follows is well to be seen.

I will be watching the flick tonite and it promises to be entertaining. This is the first Marathi movie after Dombivali Fast and Saat chya aat Gharat which has grabbed my attention. Also it looks like a big budget film from the sets and also the publicity it has generated.

With the elections round the corner this movie is sure to have some political overtures what with the MNS chief being the self-assumed messiah of the Marathi Manoos. I was not at all surprised when I got to know that the MNS chief was present at the premiere of the film in Mumbai...

...thoughts after the movie:


Upside:

A powerhouse performance by Sachin Khedkar. Now I am feeling so sorry that I missed his Jabbar Patel directed Netaji Subhash Chandra Bose :(

The monologue where Sachin Khedkar loses his cool and finally screams "Laaj vatte mala mee Marathi aslyachi!!!!" is awesome. Hats off to him. In the monologue he is surrounded by the busts of greats (hailing from Maharashtra) like Savarkar, B R Ambedkar, Bal Gangadhar Tilak, Sant Dyneshwar, Jyotiba Phule and each time he delivers a dailogue the busts move as if shaken by his admission. Here is the still from the scene:

Mahesh Manjrekar as RAJE aagdhi SHOBHUN distat. Makarand Anaspure as Raiba (his trusted aide) is witty with his one liners and delivers a punch.
The sequence which showcases how Shivaji killed Afzal Khan has been very beautifully done. I heard that 1 crore has been spent only on that.
No where the movie seems to be baised against the so called outsiders. Marathi pana nahi Maharashtriyata neat sambhali ahe.

Downside:

In the bid of not being baised, the movie seems lengthy. Dose jara jast hota ase vatte at the end. They could have easliy done away with the last scene which tries to educate the masses to vote and that too vote contructively. But apart from that there does not seem to be any downside to the movie. And after 2.5 hrs another 25 minutes should not be that big a concern.



Surely worth a dekho........btw just one more point...apart from the background score of the movie (which is good no doubt, especially jeva RAJE screen var yeta) JAI SHIVAJI JAI BHAVANI chya garjannani cinema hall (multiplex suddha :) :)) aagdhi dhum-dhumte!!!

Addu Booker Prize 2008

Arvind Adiga created history by winning the Man Booker this year (2008), but I feel critics got to the prize before Arvind Adiga :) There were critics who said that the Man Booker book this time around is way below par the previous winners and maybe the short-listed books itself were not all that great. And then there were some saying that it was a Western Conspiracy of sorts to give the award to an Indian, don’t forget that after this the Oscars went to "Slumdog Millionaire" (nothing to take away from A.R. Rehman and Rosul, they deserved there individual awards) which to me seemed to be a Slumdog in front of the other competitors. But I would not comment on the Oscars as I have not seen the other nominated films.

But considering the Man Booker, this is what I am going to do. I have instituted an Addu Booker prize. I am going to read each of the short listed books and after I am done reading I am going to give away the Addu Booker award. The only thing which I am going to use from the Man Booker committee is the final shortlist :)

Here is the shortlist for 2008 Addu Booker Award:

My take:

1) White Tiger (Arvind Adiga):
Synopsis:
Born in a village in heartland India, the son of a rickshaw puller, Balram is taken out of school by his family and put to work in a teashop. As he crushes coals and wipes tables, he nurses a dream of escape - of breaking away from the banks of Mother Ganga, into whose depths have seeped the remains of a hundred generations.
The White Tiger is a tale of two Indias. Balram’s journey from darkness of village life to the light of entrepreneurial success is utterly amoral, brilliantly irreverent, deeply endearing and altogether unforgettable.

What I felt:

I don’t know how this one made it to the Shortlist. One thing is sure White Tiger would not win the Addu Booker Prize 2008 (this is before I read the other books). Too simple a subject, written in very simple language. Too simple for the Addu Booker award L The feel I got after I finished the book was one of boredom. The journey of Balram from Dark India to the India of Light is not riveting. The twists were expected and so were the turns. Like Slumdog it talks about the dark underbelly of India. It is not what India is presently..

…Next I will be taking up Sea of Poppies (Amitav Ghosh)