When a pessimistically optimist (self-proclaimed) patriot writes…

Dear Anna,

The very fact that everybody in the country is talking about you, made me shun my Saturday morning lethargy and make this endeavor of talking to you. I had dialed that support number from my mobile (the one which we were told to give a missed call on to show solidarity with you, but the network congestion prevented me. Hence this letter)

No, we have not met before and I am sure we never will. Yet the stir which you have created in the capital and the congestion the tweets bearing your reference have caused on Twitter have not passed my notice.

I know most about you and the cause which you are fighting for thanks to the many e-mail forwards I received from my co-workers. I also googled up Ralegan Siddhi and least to say I am impressed by the phenomenon you have made out of it. Such is the impact Ralegan Siddhi has had on me that I have already planned my trip there for the month of May. Getting the leaves approved by my manager is a mere formality which remains now.

Sir, I call myself a patriot. I don’t really get a chance to salute the tricolor on Independence Day or even Republic Day, but I did celebrate India’s World Cup victory in an inebriated state at my city square, honking my car horns in unison with many other like minded souls and demanding that now was the time that Sachin Tendulkar be conferred the Bharat Ratna. The next day when I narrated this at my office, the “ooohhh’s and the aaahhh’s” I got was proof enough to brand me a patriot. Well there was this one instance when I was a bit lazy in getting up for the National Anthem (but I did get up in the end) at my city multiplex, but I think we can discount that. I am a patriot, ai’t I?

Till last week I was thinking of joining up an NGO on a part time basis, to bring about everything from “social upliftment” to “education to all”, but the project deadline at work really made me forget the last date to apply. Now I will have to wait for six months until the applications are out again. Don’t you think that working with an NGO for a year will give my resume that push which I need to get into a reputed international MBA program? Most of my friends have already done it and now are more than well off.

Now that I have shared so much about myself with you, let me also tell you that sometimes when I am high on my rum and alone I sometimes ruminate if I have become a pessimist. You think Anna, that I am a pessimist?

I aspire to go the United States of America soon. Of course the dollars hold there own charm for me, but I have promised my parents that I will be back in 2 years and that I will be marrying an Indian girl of their choice. With so much to look forward too, I feel that I am an optimist. I still got that another drink inside me. Am I right Anna?

Do I detect a scorn on your face after reading that paragraph? Well let me add that in the USA I will be actively participating in all Indian Cultural activities. I will share those pics too with all my friends on FB as a proof of my international social consciousness.

It’s almost 10:30AM now. I have to watch the news channel which is going to be the first to telecast “HAPPY ANNA TO BREAK FAST”. Alongside me is the laptop where I have already typed out my tweet. The moment you break the fast I will be submitting it. I have very deftly copied the same for my FB wall as well. You think that I will be the first to tweet, “I was the first to see him break his fast”.

Wish you success in (y)our campaign against corruption.

By the way there was this one instance not long ago when I got off from breaking the read light for as low as Rs50, but guess that narration will have to wait.

We need crusaders like you Anna.

Thanks

A pessimistically optimist (self-proclaimed) patriot

P.S: I forgot to assure you that my support is definitely with you if you stand to contest the elections. Choose my constituency, we need a true leader. I noticed a certain Mr Kalmadi too at your rally. He seems to have finally had a change of heart. Good for the nation I think.